Valerie lifted her chin. If he wanted to point then he could, she wasn’t about to stop him, his opinion and feelings always somehow came across as being more important than hers anyway. There was sensitive and there was condescending, he held a mix of both. Why should now be any different.
“So is everyone! At least I’m honest about mine. So go ahead, paint me as the monster that trampled on your heart. I’ll play the evil villain because the shoe fits right? But at the end of the day it was a thought. Everyone has them. Every couple at some point has a feeling they can’t control, that’s what makes it emotional not logical. You’re so blinded by the negative it’s like you want to see it more than anything else.”
Fingers uncurled, no longer clenched in fists as she took a breath, wiped the sticky crimson that her nails had evoked from her palms down the sides of her shirt and nodded. While he got everything off his chest she just breathed. Composed herself, because evidently he’d already catalogued her in his mind as the girl who broke his heart, like she was some complete and utter bitch out to destroy him intentionally.
“Freight train? Nice. Well you know what?” Green eyes narrowed, she fixed her cuffs, wet her lips. “I never tied you to the tracks, so no, I’m not going to run you over because I’m not a fucking train wreck. You’re acting like I slept with an entire football team but that’s fine, I’m the bad guy. I can actually live with that.”
Valerie stayed perfectly still as he paced. She’d shown enough weakness already by crying, she wasn’t going to show him how much this got to her. Whatever he expected, probably that she’d start screaming and acting like a freight train, well she wasn’t about to. He’d probably just label her ‘hysterical’ to go along with being some embodiment of a walking contradiction while filling the role of a train at the same time. God, she was talented. Which was great, it could be another disappointment added to his list of her contradictions. Heaven forbid someone in their early twenties have a moment of indecision.
“You know something, you’re right. I met you and forgot entirely who I really am. Now I remember. I know exactly who I am. Someone who follows orders. I’m not just a girl, I never will be. I’m a Slayer and it’s time I focused on that. It’s what I’m built for. It’s what I’m good at. I don’t juggle hearts Brian I stake them. I guess I staked yours too. Must be that killer instinct. Some things just stick, I guess.”
One hand slipped into her back pocket and took out a crumpled cheque for five thousand, she gazed at it for a moment, her expression softened as her head tilted to the side. It went blank before she walked towards him. Pressed it into his palm calmly. “That was the good news I’d wanted to share. You need it for buying protection. But that’s just my opinion do what you want with it. Feel free to rip it up or give it to charity or set fire to it. You do what you need to do, and so will I.”
She stepped back then, held his gaze. Valerie didn’t want the money back, it was barely anything compared to what her bank account held, but just because she’d been dumped didn’t mean she wanted to see him harmed in any way. Quite the opposite.
“Take care, Brian.”
Then she turned and headed to the door. Quietly grabbing the remains of her tie that she’d dropped on the floor. Emotions, she needed to rid herself of them before they consumed her like a stormy sea. He could think of her whatever way he wanted but she wasn’t about to start a massive scene or go toe to toe with him like it was war. Valerie was raised better than that. He made a choice; she respected it. There was nothing else to do.
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ninetydegrees
no subject
on 2013-12-28 12:18 am (UTC)“So is everyone! At least I’m honest about mine. So go ahead, paint me as the monster that trampled on your heart. I’ll play the evil villain because the shoe fits right? But at the end of the day it was a thought. Everyone has them. Every couple at some point has a feeling they can’t control, that’s what makes it emotional not logical. You’re so blinded by the negative it’s like you want to see it more than anything else.”
Fingers uncurled, no longer clenched in fists as she took a breath, wiped the sticky crimson that her nails had evoked from her palms down the sides of her shirt and nodded. While he got everything off his chest she just breathed. Composed herself, because evidently he’d already catalogued her in his mind as the girl who broke his heart, like she was some complete and utter bitch out to destroy him intentionally.
“Freight train? Nice. Well you know what?” Green eyes narrowed, she fixed her cuffs, wet her lips. “I never tied you to the tracks, so no, I’m not going to run you over because I’m not a fucking train wreck. You’re acting like I slept with an entire football team but that’s fine, I’m the bad guy. I can actually live with that.”
Valerie stayed perfectly still as he paced. She’d shown enough weakness already by crying, she wasn’t going to show him how much this got to her. Whatever he expected, probably that she’d start screaming and acting like a freight train, well she wasn’t about to. He’d probably just label her ‘hysterical’ to go along with being some embodiment of a walking contradiction while filling the role of a train at the same time. God, she was talented. Which was great, it could be another disappointment added to his list of her contradictions. Heaven forbid someone in their early twenties have a moment of indecision.
“You know something, you’re right. I met you and forgot entirely who I really am. Now I remember. I know exactly who I am. Someone who follows orders. I’m not just a girl, I never will be. I’m a Slayer and it’s time I focused on that. It’s what I’m built for. It’s what I’m good at. I don’t juggle hearts Brian I stake them. I guess I staked yours too. Must be that killer instinct. Some things just stick, I guess.”
One hand slipped into her back pocket and took out a crumpled cheque for five thousand, she gazed at it for a moment, her expression softened as her head tilted to the side. It went blank before she walked towards him. Pressed it into his palm calmly. “That was the good news I’d wanted to share. You need it for buying protection. But that’s just my opinion do what you want with it. Feel free to rip it up or give it to charity or set fire to it. You do what you need to do, and so will I.”
She stepped back then, held his gaze. Valerie didn’t want the money back, it was barely anything compared to what her bank account held, but just because she’d been dumped didn’t mean she wanted to see him harmed in any way. Quite the opposite.
“Take care, Brian.”
Then she turned and headed to the door. Quietly grabbing the remains of her tie that she’d dropped on the floor. Emotions, she needed to rid herself of them before they consumed her like a stormy sea. He could think of her whatever way he wanted but she wasn’t about to start a massive scene or go toe to toe with him like it was war. Valerie was raised better than that. He made a choice; she respected it. There was nothing else to do.