We Have to Stop Meeting Like This

[st_clare]

Julianna had been uncertain when she saw the notice in the faculty lounge about an event for Halloween. It wasn't that she was superstitious, and perhaps surprisingly the day wasn't known for extra trouble as far as the supernatural went, but this would be her first faculty event since taking up her teaching duties at UNLV. She was the only non-American in her department, and with the exception of a few of her already-tenured colleagues, she was one of the oldest people on staff. She wondered if she wouldn't stick out like a sore thumb.

Hopefully they'd at least serve alcohol.

So she found herself in a shop looking over their selection of costumes and feeling grateful that none of them were too tacky. If all else failed, she could pull something suitable out of her closet. When she wanted retail therapy, she shopped elsewhere.

The realization that Halloween was just a couple of weeks away reminded her that Christmas was closing in. No chance of snow here in Nevada. She'd just have to make the best of it.

Comments

[holiday_pirner]

Holly examined herself in the three-way mirror, turning to the side. Halloween was one of her favorite excuses to dress up, mainly because it allowed her to be someone else for a night. She adjusted the hem of her skirt. The brunette wasn't sure inexplicably sexy pirate was the look for her.

She turned to walk back into the changing room when she caught sight of Julianna browsing racks of costumes. At that point, the situation became laughable.

Approaching the watcher casually, she spoke up, "What do you think?" Holly did a semi-twirl. "Bad life decision? Or merely acting out to make my father roll over in his grave?" She poked at a pink wig on display.

[st_clare]

Hell.

Julianna made herself look because she felt like it would be churlish not to, managed to merely raise an eyebrow at Holiday's choice. She stopped toying with the hem of the silver dress that hung from the rack. She felt like she had good legs for her age, but the dress was much too short to be decent to wear in public.

"The wig would not be your best choice," she told the girl. "At least not that particular color. Your skin's too fair and it would make you look washed out." It would also make her look like a Kewpie doll gone mad, but she didn't make that observation.

[holiday_pirner]

Her hand dropped to her side, the corners of her mouth threatening to break into a smirk. "Oh. I would look washed out, you say? Hm." Holly had about ten possible retorts to that.

"Are you sure you're in the right store? I don't think they sell slacks or sensible shoes here."

[st_clare]

She would not lose her temper. She wasn't a girl anymore, and even when she had been a girl she'd been reasonably unflappable. Calm, level-headed Julianna.

The Watcher assumed a bland expression, lifted her shoulders in a shrug. "I'm only here because there's to be a faculty event at the university. I'm not normally one to play dress-up unless it's for a formal occasion, but there seems to be an unwritten rule and I'd like to follow it since it's my first chance to associate with the people I work with outside of the classroom."

And why was she explaining it? Holiday likely didn't care, or if she did it was so peripheral to her that it might not even register. The Englishwoman let her gaze wander over the brunette's possible costume choice again, the look merely assessing rather than passing judgement. As sarcastic as the remark had been, Holiday wasn't wrong. Gregory would not have approved.

[holiday_pirner]

"I'm sure they're all looking forward to that. Why, after three vodka gimlets, you might even be mistaken for human."

Holly picked up the silver dress that Julianna had been studying. "You know, you really do that judgmental gaze well. Have you thought of maybe nun?"

She nodded toward the black and white costume on display on the wall.

[st_clare]

That earned an arched eyebrow, that and an intake of breath as the Watcher's eyes drifted towards the nun's costume. Not a bad replica, all things considered.

"I'd never be able to pull it off," Julianna said with a muted snort. "I'm not pious enough, and I'm hardly nunnish in my private life. It would be too much like sarcasm to make the attempt."

There. Make something out of that, why don't you?

[holiday_pirner]

Holly rolled her eyes toward the ceiling. "Oh, my god. We get it, okay? You have sex." The cashier looked up at them, but she didn't bother lowering her voice.

"I am so very, very happy for you."

[st_clare]

Perhaps the two of them needed to get some new material. But then again, Holiday was the one who'd compared her to a nun, so it was difficult to decide who was really at fault. Julianna schooled her expression into a polite mask, ignored the stare of the cashier.

"Is your costume for a party or will you be answering the door for trick-or-treaters at your new flat?"

[holiday_pirner]

"As exciting as handing out candy to the nonexistent children that live in my building sounds, no." Holly walked back toward the changing room.

"Maybe I'll crash your party," the brunette said. "It sounds delightful. Are you bringing what's-his-name?"

[st_clare]

Something like regret crossed Julianna's face for a moment, and she quickly buried it. She'd thought about inviting Nathan, and if she was honest with herself she'd have been more at ease with him there, but her colleagues wouldn't have known what to make of it. An event at a hotel was one thing, but there were proprieties to observe at work.

"No, I'm not," she said evenly. The cashier had gone back to her register, taking her attention away from the two of them. "There are those who wouldn't understand, and you can't force someone to confront their prejudices in a single evening."

[holiday_pirner]

She shrugged, stepping into the stall that held her street clothes and pulled the small curtain shut. "At least he's not a student," Holly replied, unzipping the costume.

"Okay, so all bitchiness aside, I have a question to ask you." The brunette pulled a lightweight sweater over her head. It was easier to talk to Julianna without looking at her. Maybe they should have all of their conversations through a fitting room curtain.

"Do you know about, um, denizens of the underworld?" Holly borrowed Rhiannon's phrase.

[st_clare]

"Like...like demons?"

The change of subject was so abrupt that it left Julianna nonplussed, and she faced away from the curtain to study some more of the costumes on display. It just might be easier to talk if they didn't look at each other.

"There are all manner of things as far as supernatural creatures go," the Watcher said, lowering her voice to a discreet murmur. "Some are more human in appearance than others. Why do you ask?"

[holiday_pirner]

Fully dressed, she pulled the curtain aside. "Because I met one. When I first came to Vegas. She was the one who told me about Searchlight."

Holly put the costume back on the hanger. "It probably doesn't matter now. I guess I wasn't more freaked out at the time because of the drugs." She shrugged.

[st_clare]

"Will it offend you if I say I'm worried about you?"

Julianna's voice was muted because she was looking down, and she continued to avoid eye contact rather than try to make Holiday meet her eye. It seemed better that way, less demanding.

"You were right before. I do have a guilty conscience. And I'd rather not have anything that might happen to you on it. I've resigned myself to the fact that you don't want my concern, but I'm not giving up caring what becomes of you."

[holiday_pirner]

"I don't like people caring about me, okay? Concern, pity, empathy, whatever. It only makes me feel like I owe them something." Holly put the costume back where she found it.

"Whatever happens to me won't be your fault. Does that make you feel any better?"

[st_clare]

"I should imagine that Daniel cares if you live or die. Or at least I would hope he does."

Julianna blew out a long breath. No, it didn't bloody make her feel any better. Holiday couldn't absolve her of blame or remorse or guilt, and no matter how many times she tried to make the old wound close it continued to be open and raw, a boil on her soul. That was why she didn't want the girl to die, as selfish as it was.

"I won't ask anything of you," the Watcher said, her voice still muted. "Just...don't close the door completely."

[holiday_pirner]

"He's different."

She didn't elaborate. She wasn't sure she could, not eloquently, anyway. Holly sighed, brushing hair out of her eyes. "I can't help sounding harsh anymore than you can help sounding...like you."

The brunette added, feeling oddly generous, "I'm sure you're good at what you do. And it wasn't your fault, what happened to her."

[st_clare]

"You can't say that. You weren't there."

The Watcher finally turned to face the brunette, her expression uncomfortably vulnerable. "I knew the risks of getting attached. We aren't supposed to. And she didn't fill a daughterly role. I'm not soft enough for that. But I did care for her, and it was my job to prepare her for what she'd be facing. That makes it my fault."

It was more than she should have said in a place like this, and Holiday was probably the last person she should be using as a confessor. It clearly wasn't as if the girl didn't have her own burdens. Julianna broke the eye contact.

"If I give you the number at my flat, will you ring me if you need something?"

[holiday_pirner]

She waited a beat, then nodded. "I won't need anything. But if for some reason I ever do, then yes."

Holly tried not to notice Julianna's expression.

[st_clare]

The Englishwoman reached into her messenger bag, pulled out a small pad of paper and a ballpoint pen. She wrote down her home number, concentrating on forming the digits as if it were the most important task in the world. There was a quiet sound as she tore the top sheet loose, and she folded it and handed it off to Holiday. She still didn't look up.

"I won't count on hearing from you," she said matter-of-factly. "This is just for...an emergency."

[holiday_pirner]

Holly wasn't sure what else there was to say. She held the piece of paper between her fingers. "Thanks." Short, simple, awkward.

"I should probably..." Holly trailed off. The brunette had no idea what she should probably do.

[st_clare]

"Yes. So should I. I always seem to keep you too long."

It would be uncomfortable to touch the girl on the arm, and a hug was out of the question. Julianna looked at Holiday in profile for a moment, then put her back to the brunette and moved further into the shop. If neither of them felt any lighter, then they had at least one thing in common.